Advancing Women Podcast

The Deals We Make

Work and Family Decisions and the Impact on Women’s Bargaining Power

Women’s workforce decisions, whether to work full time, work part time or stay at home (after starting a family) can have a significant impact not only on our economic wealth over our lifetime, but also on our agency, voice, and bargaining power.

This episode explores the full complexity of our roles, our bargaining power and our voice in the home and in the workplace. We’ll talk about the Opt-Out Revolution and the Opt-out Myth. It’s a conversation not just about our choices, but also about knowing and acknowledging the unintended or hidden consequence on our earning potential for the lifespan.

This episode will serve as a cautionary tale and/or a road map to guide you if you’re in the thick of it.

#leanin #getbacktowork #thefemininemystique #genderequity #womenempowerwomen

Emotional Labor

Do you ever feel the overwhelming need to scream ENOUGH! I’M DONE! If you’ve felt the frustration of  not only the constant managing of every small task, but also managing your feelings and emotions and frustrations when nobody seems to understand all you do. And managing other people’s emotions to ensure you keep everyone else comfortable and happy. The physical tasks, but also all the invisible emotional work – that other people don’t ever seem to see, but WE see it and feel it. In everything we do, at home and at work, everywhere. This is emotional labor.

Emotional labor is an important discussion, especially for women because It’s everywhere. Constantly having to be mindful of how our every action, anything we say or do, might be interpreted, misinterpreted, or judged. Emotional labor then is the unpaid work that many still don't understand.

Don’t miss this episode which brings the discussion of emotional labor to the forefront as we challenge the gendered nature of emotional labor and the distasteful social constructs that suggest we as women are somehow genetically predisposed to this often invisible, unacknowledged, and under-appreciated effort. Acknowledging emotional labor is foundational to discussions of equity and equality and these conversations are part of our path to change.

The Art and Agony of Saying NO!

Of all the advice given to women, almost nothing is as oversimplified as the advice to say no to service work, or volunteer work. Unpaid work. This episode goes beyond creating boundaries and controlling our own narrative. We consider with compassion why saying no, while difficult for many people, can be especially difficult for women. We examine the very real patterns of bias, social norms and expectations that contribute to why women often find saying no so challenging.

All you warriors listening have heard me say many times that this podcast is where empathy meets pragmatism, and nowhere is that more the case than this episode. We will discuss the art of saying no and the practical steps to decline effectively and confidently those unpaid, unappreciated projects that don’t move the needle in terms of your advancement goals.

If it’s not a HELL YES, then it probably should be a HELL NO. Make room for the HELL YES opportunities that the universe is working on sending you!!

Glamorizing the Grind: Why Overwork and Burnout Are Not a Badge of Honor!

Our extreme work culture - the culture of overwork - and the glorification of overwork is problematic. We all pay a price for overwork including stress and burnout which threaten our health and emotional well-being,

And additional home responsibilities and societal expectations put women at a distinct disadvantage in extreme work models, not because women shirk the pressure or responsibility of extreme work, but because of the many social, cultural reasons that women are unlikely to be able to match the hours logged by their male colleagues.

 This episode addresses the extreme work model, presenteeism, and a 24/7 work culture where high intensity and constant deadlines are the norm, everything is an emergency, and every problem is critical.

 A culture of constant accessibility and availability has become the productivity standard. But is it necessary? We need to rethink outdated and unnecessary attributes of the ideal worker as one willing to prioritize their job above all.

The absence of sleep, good diet, exercise, relaxation, time with family and friends - time to just BE - is not something to be applauded. To many people were burnout as a badge of honor, and it needs to change. If you want to stop glamorizing the grind, this is the episode for you!

Where Are the Women? Diversity, Equity, & Inclusion and Advancing Women.

Despite women’s advancement in the workforce, the pipeline for women to top level executive positions of power, pay, and prestige remains broken. Women have advanced, but only to a point. This episode addresses how many social-cultural, institutional, and structural biases and barriers can hold talented, qualifies warrior women back.

And it is not just low at the CEO level, it is all executive levels. In the financial services industry, women make up 61 percent of accountants and auditors, 53 percent of financial managers, and 37 percent of financial analysts…but they are only 13% of chief financial officers in Fortune 500 companies. Women make up 54% of law students. Yet despite the larger numbers, only 20% are equity partners. The reality is that the higher a woman rises in a law firm, the greater the chance she will be one of the only women in the room. The inequity exists at top levels in every domain…despite women’s herculean efforts.

This episode discusses diversity, equity, and inclusion and what these terms mean specifically as it relates to advancing women. The next time someone states how much better things have gotten for women and asks the condescending question “so what is it you want then…” you will be ready to say…I am glad you asked.

This episode focuses on how diversity, equity, inclusion and most importantly ACTION can drive a more diverse, equitable and inclusive workforce and world.

Warriors Need Love (and Self-Care) Too!

The World Health Organization kicked off Self-Care Month on June 24th leading up to Self-Care Day on July 24th So we will likely be seeing and hearing more about the importance of self-care in the upcoming weeks.

Self-care sometimes, unfortunately can be the first thing to go when we’re stressed which is when we need it most. This is such an important topic for everyone but especially for women.

In this episode I am joined by wellness warrior Erica Golub to discuss the crucial subject of self-care and wellness. I’m excited to welcome Erica to the advancing women podcast. Erica is a certified yoga, mindfulness and meditation practitioner and inventor of Backyard Yoga, a mindfulness movement and meditation tool set for kids.

The strong women. The warriors. Too often the world can be quick to critique and slow to show compassion and caring, especially if they don’t think you need it. Just because we are strong - whether it’s physically mentally or emotionally doesn’t mean we don’t need people or support. Women are often seen as someone who needs to care for others, not necessarily as someone who needs to be cared FOR.

Join us for this episode where we discuss self-care strategies including the mindset, skillset, and toolset (what you think, what you know, and what you do) to ensure you give the world the best of you, instead of what’s left of you.

All Women are Defective!

Look up the word defective in the dictionary. It’s an adjective meaning imperfect or faulty. And faulty is defined as working badly or unreliably, having or displaying weaknesses. So, you’re probably thinking – wow – really? That is an unexpended and potentially offensive episode title for the Advancing Women Podcast. It is provocative, for sure, but it is meant to punctuate the messaging we as women experience. When we consider perceptions of women through the social-cultural lens as it relates to our life choices related to work, advancement, and family – the message tends to imply imperfect, faulty…defective in some way, regardless of the choices we as women make and the paths we take.

Whether you are a stay-at-home mom, a working mom, or a woman who has chosen not to have children – if you have ever felt like your choices have resulted in judgement, then this is an episode you don’t want to miss.

And…if you work, then come home and feel like you are starting your “second shift” you are not alone. The “second shift” refers to the household and childcare duties that follow the day's work. Plentiful research shows that despite women being more educated and more employed than ever, they are still taking on most of the household and familial duties. And it’s not just about chores and childcare; women are also much more likely to be the ones who care for sick or elderly parents. This is episode discusses this very real imbalance that has negative consequences for women’s professional advancement. This episode also addresses how Tug of War Bias can sneak in. Where bias against women can foster conflict amongst women and what we as warriors can do to interrupt those negative patterns.

Fear of Failure

The narrative is so prevalent: women are afraid to fail. Women don’t take risks. We hear this all the time. Often as a part of the explanation of women’s lack of advancement. This episode addresses how gender bias impacts fear and how fear impacts women’s advancement. The discussion of FEAR is important because research shows that people just don’t perform as well in a culture fear.

With risk of course, is increased chance for failure and we all fear failure. Research shows that women have higher levels of fear of failure and take failure and negative feedback harder, in part, because failure has a more lasting negative impact on women. This episode helps explain the barriers and biases that impact how women’s mistakes are perceived and how this effects women’s fear of failure and willingness to take risks.

Too often explanations are oversimplified: women just don’t take risks, can’t take criticism, don’t have high self-efficacy, don’t have confidence – all explanations that don’t serve women and are really just the wolf in sheep’s clothing. Blame the women. Notice a pattern? Fix the women, fix the problem. So frustratingly resilient.

Women often feel the weight of our actions, and mistakes as having a negative impact on all women. Former US representative Clare Boothe Loose nailed it when she said “Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say, 'She doesn't have what it takes'; They will say, 'Women don't have what it takes”.

This episode calls out the inequity’s women experience that create fear and provides the tools to transcend; the skillset, mindset, and toolset to embrace our fears in order to be the fierce, resilient warriors we are meant to be.

Fear itself does not have to be a problem. In fact, as Mark Twain famously said “Courage is not the lack of fear. It is acting in spite of it.” Action in the face of fear is badass and this episode will help you flip the script from a story of women being more afraid – to a story of resilience, grit and anti-fragility.

Queen Bee Syndrome

Is Queen Bee Syndrome losing its sting to the emerging “Persisterhood” Narrative?

With so much of the social media messaging focusing on women empowering women and women supporting women, how do we explain Queen Bee Syndrome – that phenomenon where high ranking women in positions of authority treat the women who work below them more critically than their male counterparts and even that they can oppose or hinder the advancement of other women.

This episode addresses this difficult issue and identifies the biases that contribute to it. What do lobsters in a boiling pot of water have to do with women’s advancement – find out in this episode which addresses how bias against women can foster conflict among women – and what we can do to interrupt that pattern that does not serve us.

We address patterns like distancing oneself from “other” women (disassociating), assimilating (to masculine gender stereotypical traits), destructive leadership behaviors (bullying, ridiculing, or harassing), and system justification (people defending and justifying these highly resilient negative stereotypes) which can result when organizations create a win-lose environment where tokenism and gender inequality are deeply entrenched in the culture.

This episode discusses the research that shows how the queen bee phenomenon can be a consequence of gender biased social and organizational structures and circumstances.

We challenge the narratives that perpetuate the image of women being difficult to work for or with or out of place in senior leadership roles. Narratives that preserve a gendered status quo that just does not work for women, and I will show how we can use the 4Ps advancement model to interrupt negative patterns.

Finally, we discuss what organizations need can do to reward the behaviors that create supportive environments that keep Queen Bee Syndrome at bay.

Maya Angelou famously said do your best until you know better than do better. That really sums up the purpose of the #advancingwomenpodcast. That more of us can KNOW…and that knowing will help us all DO better.

Learn more about the 4 Ps Advancement Model ™ @ www.advancingwomenpodcast.com

Email me to share ideas or feedback @ drdesimone@advancingwomenpodcast.com

Connect on Instagram @ https://www.instagram.com/advancingwomenpodcast/

The 4P's Advancement Model™

“You do not rise to the level of your goals, but you fall to the level of your systems.” (James Clear, Atomic Habits, 2018).

What are the habits, strategies, and systems you have in place to ensure you rise to your goals? This episode addresses actionable steps and processes to disrupt biases that create barriers to your advancement goals.

I am thrilled to have an amazing warrior guest this week to share their expertise and insight. Denette Suddeth is a Certified Executive Coach with expertise in career planning, change leadership, effective communication, emotional intelligence, leadership development, strategic planning, and team building. She brings a wealth of knowledge on how we can harness our emotional intelligence to serve in achieving our advancement goals.

In this episode we discuss the Neuroscience of the slow brain versus fast brain and hour our emotional intelligence skills can become the Super Skills we need to transcend and thrive.

This Advancing Women Podcast is where empathy meets pragmatism, and this episode pragmatically shows how we can confidently and strategically address workplace biases and barriers utilizing the 4 Ps Advancement Model ™ by evaluating the Problems, Patterns, Processes and Proficiencies to interrupt bias patterns in ways that serve rather than sabotage our advancement.

We also discuss how the TKD Process ™ (What you THINK, what you KNOW, and what you DO) can help ensure you have the right mindset, skillset, and toolset to not only transcend barriers and biases but also can serve as the catalyst to hone important warrior skills like grit, resiliency, and anti-fragility.

If you are fed up with being tone policed…if you have ever been told “calm down” you definitely want to tune in and learn how to take control of YOUR narrative to ensure you create purposeful perceptions that serve you in your advancement goals. “You have the ability to influence and impact your advancement” (Denette Suddeth – this episode!).

Learn more about the the 4 Ps Advancement Model ™ @ www.advancingwomenpodcast.com

Email me to share ideas or feedback @ drdesimone@advancingwomenpodcast.com

Connect on Instagram @ https://www.instagram.com/advancingwomenpodcast/

Learn more about today’s guest: Denette Suddeth @ https://www.linkedin.com/in/denettesuddeth/ 

Email: denette@suddethinc.com Website: Denette Suddeth | Corporate Coach